Motherhood, A Divine Calling

by Rev. Jeremiah Cheung

https://youtube.com/watch?v=videoseries%3Flist%3DPLECAEE36C76FA8BD0

Napoleon once said, “The hand that rocks the cradle rules the world.” But we can also say, that “The hand that rocks the cradle destroys the world, too.” Mothers, how important and how great you are! Motherhood is a divine calling. What is this calling?

I. This is a Call to Childbirth

Life is a form of miracle. Children are gifts from the Lord. In the 40 weeks of pregnancy, as the embryo starts to grow until the baby reaches its full term, women are involved in a very special divine work. God and you are in partnership in creating life.

Those among us who are mothers must surely have experienced this. From conception till birth, the mother is always concerned about the baby in her womb. We put a lot of restrictions on ourselves. We dare not perform strenuous exercises, we refrain from alcohol, smoking, and drugs. We will not carelessly take medicine for fear it may affect the developing fetus.

It is not only during these forty weeks that we make lots of sacrifices. After giving birth, we are careful to give the baby enough nutrition, breastfeeding the baby. Again, we refrain from eating or drinking anything which may adversely affect the baby. After the baby is weaned from milk, the mother’s sacrifices continue. We often hear people say, “Behind every great man is a great woman.” But who is this woman? It may not necessarily be the wife, it could be the mother. President Lincoln had once publicly declared that behind him was a great woman, and that great woman was his mother. We can also say, behind a great man are two great women, one is his wife, and the other is his mother.

II. This is a Call to Feed and Care

Childbearing is indeed not easy. The forty-week pregnancy is truly a difficult period for mothers. Some mothers even have to lie in bed the whole 40 weeks. Still, these 40 weeks eventually ends; and the child is born. The next 30-40 years is more difficult! It is not easy to give birth to a child, but it is even more difficult to train up a child.

Mothers have to journey with their babies throughout their growing years. The most significant period for a baby’s development is year one to three. It is during this time that the baby’s character is formed, that love and trust begin to be established between mother and child. During this period, the child only knows how to cry. Whatever his needs – when he is hungry, when he is wet, when he is sick, he cries. When he cries and his mother responds to his needs, the child learns to love and trust. How his mother responds to his needs will determine the child’s emotions. It will determine how he will feel about the world, whether he will learn to trust or not, feel secure or not.

There is a famous theory regarding child-rearing called Childhood Pyramid. This theory says there is one person on the highest point of the pyramid. The first person who influences the child is the one on top of the pyramid. Usually, the child’s mother is the first person who influences him. However, there are some special situations, such as if the mother dies, then the father or the grandmother becomes the first person. In some cases, it can be the nanny. If the first person treats the baby like a king or a prince, this child will grow up seeing the world as a warm place, his heart will be filled with love. If the first person maltreats the child, the child will see the world as a fearful place, his heart will be full of hatred, and he will become unsociable. It is best that a mother stay at home and take care of her child during his first three years, because these are the most important years of the child’s development. Money can be earned later on, education can be secured later, but the first three years of the child can never be regained. Once you lose these three years, you may pay with 30 years of heartaches. The greatest gift a mother can give her child is to be there for him during the first three years of his life. Are you willing?

III. This is a Calling to Invest in the Eternal and Imperishable

1. Leave Them with Good Memories

We all love our children and we give them a lot of things. We often do our best to give them their needs. That is how great parents are. It is alright for us not to have these things, what is important is that our children have them. But how will our children remember us someday? That we had given them gameboy, psp, iphone, macbook? No, they will remember the things we had told them and what we had done for them.

2. Leave Them a Positive and Good Environment

A famous poem states:

If a child lives with criticism, he learns to condemn
If a child lives with hostility, he learns to fight
If a child lives with ridicule, he learns to be shy
If a child lives with shame, he learns to be guilty
If a child lives with tolerance, he learns to be patient
If a child lives with encouragement, he learns to be confident
If a child lives with praise, he learns to appreciate
If a child lives with fairness, he learns justice
If a child lives in security, he learns to have faith
If a child lives with approval, he learns to like himself
If a child lives with acceptance and friendship, he learns to find love in this world.

Are we leaving our children with a positive or a negative environment? From today on, you must learn to build a positive environment for your children.

3. Set an Anchor for Their Faith

A vast ship is able to settle steadily on the surface of the sea because of its anchor. When we send our children out into the world, and they face life’s storms, will they be able to remain steady in the big sea of life? John 3:4 “I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth.” Notice, that the verse did not say see, but, hear. Hear because your children are no longer beside you, they are grown up and have left home. Yet you hear they are walking in the truth, because they have not departed from the faith you have set for them. What are the things your children have done which have brought you happiness? Passed exams into the best universities? Earned six figure salaries? Have a boy or girlfriend of your liking? Given you several cute grandchildren? But let me ask you, are these your joy and fulfilment or are they your children’s?

As parents, we want our children to have many choices in life. We sacrifice a lot of things for their sake. Many families migrate to other countries for the sake of their children. We are already in our 40’s or 50’s. It is difficult for us to adjust into a new environment, learn a new culture, new language, and make new friends. But for the sake of our children, so that they may have better futures and more choices, we would be willing to go. This is how great parents can be. But we must remember that the most important thing is not that our children have many choices, but that they make the right choices. When they grow up, can your children make correct life choices?

IV. This is a Call to Let Go Because of Love

This is the most difficult thing for parents to do, especially mothers – letting go. Genesis 2:24 “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.” This is the first time the word mother appeared in the Bible. This is the first time that the Bible tells the mother to let go. This is very difficult. Imagine, you take care of the child for 20-30 years. As his mother, you know very well your child and his needs, then after he is grown, you have to release him to another woman, how can this be? “Who are you, how can you know my son’s needs, what he eats, drinks, how can you know better than I?” Thus, two women fight over one man. We all know the story of Solomon resolving the problem of two women fighting over one baby. Two women gave birth to two babies, one baby died, and the dead baby’s mother took the live baby. They fought over the live baby. Solomon suggested that they cut the baby in two, each one gets half. The real mother said, “No, please give the living baby to her. Don’t kill him.” The other woman said, “Good, cut him in two. That is fair.” Solomon then said, “Give the living baby to the first woman, she is his mother because she truly loves the child.” Not only does this story show Solomon’s wisdom, this story also demonstrates that the real mother is the one who is willing to let go. There are immature, selfish mothers in this world and they would rather cut their sons in two. Because the mother is not willing to let go, two women end up fighting over one man.

When do we let go of our child? When he is in college? When he is married? Too late! We begin to let go once he no longer asks you where he came from, when he doesn’t tell you anymore where he is going. You prepare your heart and begin to let go when these things start to happen.

As the child grows day by day, we let go day by day. When they establish their own family, the first person on the pyramid will no longer be you, the mother, but it will be her husband, or his wife. As parents, especially mothers, although once we were the first person on the pyramid, we must now learn to give way, and stop holding on to our children because that is a sign of immaturity and selfishness!