In part one of this two-part message, Rev. Jeremiah Cheung shared two of the four practices in child-training: Awakening the spiritual appetite and Being a good example to children. This week, Rev. Cheung concludes the message by revealing the next two boundaries for godly parenting.

Sermon Notes

Two More Practices in Child-Training

1. Use _____ to teach them

2. ______ them
a. Understand that each child is _____ in his personality
b. Establish an ______ boundary
c. The stance of the two parents should be the _____
d. The 3 C’s of discipline
– 1. _________
– 2. _________
– 3. _________

Three Mistakes often committed during discipline
1. Exercise leniency before _______
2. Accomplish something through _______
3. Emphasize achievements more than _______

Lifegroup Discussion Questions

1. Please share how your children differ in their personalities?

2. Are the boundaries you have set for your children appropriate?

3. As parents, do you practice the same disciplinary method(s) with your children?

4. Can you please share your experiences with regards to the “3Cs of Discipline.” In which of the three principles did you find failure or success?

5. In which three areas do parents often make mistakes while disciplining their children? Which area do you have the most experience with?

Sermon Notes – Answers

I.
1) God’s Word
2) Discipline
a) Unique b) Appropriate c) Same
d.1) Caring d.2) Calm d.3) Consistent

II.
1) Strictness
2) Others
3) On Character

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Children are blessings from God. Parents have a calling to nurture their children with love and train them in the way of the Lord. This week, Rev. Jeremiah Cheung begins a two-part message on the healthy boundaries that parents must observe to raise godly children. This sermon is part of our current series entitled “Healthy Boundaries, Healthy Relationships.” See Part 12

Sermon Notes

It’s a good thing when an individual comes to personal salvation, loves the Lord, and serves the Lord; yet God’s heart is not satisfied because God’s desire is a family. God’s heart leans towards the family, not individualism. This week, Rev. Jeremiah Cheung introduces us to three families in The Book of Acts who came to know the Lord and served the Lord as a family.

The first is the family of Cornelius. The second is Lydia’s family. The third is the family of the jailer. When Jesus was on earth, he often visited a family in Bethany because it was a family that served the Lord. There were only three people in this family – Martha, Mary, and Lazarus.

Psalms 127 shows us two important principles about training children.

1. Two Principles in Child Training
a. Children are ______ from the Lord
b. Children are ______ in the hands of a warrior

2. Four Practices in Child Training
a. Awaken their spiritual _______
b. Be an _________ to them.

Note: The last two practices will be discussed in next week’s message.

Lifegroup Discussion Questions

1. Children are a heritage from the Lord. This verse is directed towards parents. What does the verse remind us of? How do you think this verse differs with our Chinese culture?

2. Children are like arrows in the hands of a warrior. Are arrows found in nature or are they created by the hands of men? Is your child an arrow or a piece of wood?

3. For children to be arrows in God’s hands, what should parents do?

4. How do we awaken the spiritual appetite of our children? What are the difficulties of modeling? How do we use God’s word to teach our children?

Sermon Notes — Answers

1. a) a heritage b) arrows
2. a) appetites b) example

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Our Lord Jesus Christ demonstrated the boundary of slowing down through the study of scripture and the practice of silence and solitude. In this week’s message, Ptr. Genesis Tan reminds us that Jesus invites us to slow down to connect with Him. See Part 11

Abide in Jesus because He alone is the source of the Greatest Love that we can experience. His love is what enables us to love others as He loved us. This is the kind of love that makes our relationships healthier by enabling us to become better lovers, better husbands and wives, better fathers and mothers, better sons and daughters, better bosses and workers, better friends, and better leaders.

Lifegroup Discussion Questions

1. What do you want to remember from today’s message?

2. What one small action step can you take to begin abiding in Jesus?

3. What challenges are you facing now that makes it difficult for you to Slow Down and how can you overcome it?

4. What things do you need to stop doing and what things do you need to start doing to slow down to connect with God and others?

5. With whom can you share what you learned today?

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A mother’s hands are praying hands — for only through prayer can a mother fulfill the mission God has entrusted to her. This week, Rev. Cheung explains how one becomes a prayerful mother. See Part 10

Sermon Notes

Mothers are called to be great women; the responsibilities they are asked to bear are far heavier than that of fathers. A mother is her child’s encourager, counselor, teacher, tutor, the accountant of the home, a homemaker, and in many cases, also the driver! These are just some of the many roles mothers are called to fulfill.

Mothers possess one unique trait: they always think of their children. A mother’s heart is always with her children. No matter how old you are, for as long as your mother is still around, you will always be in her heart. But beyond just thinking constantly of their children, mothers ought to pray for their children. A mother’s hands are praying hands — for only through prayer can they fulfill the mission God has entrusted to them as mothers. This week, let us explore how one becomes a prayerful mother.

1. Pray hard for oneself
a. ________ – gives us enthusiasm to pray
b. _______ – the we may hold on to God’s promises as we pray
c. ________ – that we may pray unceasingly

2. Pray for Your Children in Four Aspects
a. Pray for your children’s ____________
b. Pray that your children may be ________________ to the enemy
c. Pray for your children to have a ____________________
d. Pray for your ____________________________

Life Group Discussion Questions

1. To become prayerful, a person should have faith, hope, and love. Why is it necessary to have these three? Please give some examples.

2. Mothers are unique in that they often think of their children. If prayer is added to “thinking about their children,” what difference would it make?

3. We can pray for our children in four aspects:
• Pray for our children’s spiritual lives.
• Pray for our children to be free from bondage to the enemy.
• Pray for our children to have a strong heart and spirit.
• Pray for our children’s children.

4. Which aspect/s are you strong in and which aspect/s are you weak and lacking in? Please share your experience.

Sermon Notes: Answers

1. a. Faith b. Hope c. Love

2.
a. spiritual life
b. free from bondage
c. strong heart and spirit
d. future generations (children’s children)

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Being a father is not easy. The role proved to be a struggle even for David, the king who was called “a man after God’s own heart.” This week, Rev. Jeremiah Cheung reflects on David’s example and shares three boundaries that fathers are to uphold to raise godly children. See Part 9

Sermon Notes

Do parents really have a direct influence on how their children turn out? Do good parents really produce good children and bad parents bring up bad children?

We can all agree that parents play a significant role in how their children turn out. Rev. Cheung believes that the most important things parents can do are (1) to fulfill their parental roles and (2) entrust their children into the Lord’s hands.

David has been called “a man after God’s own heart,” but he was not “a father after God’s own heart.” In this message, Rev. Cheung uses David as an example because, like many of us, David was not qualified to be a father. May David’s example serve as our warning and reminder.

1. David was an ____________ father
– lacked the boundary line of being __________

2. David was a ____________ father
– lacked the boundary line of __________

3. David was a father who didn’t _______________ his children
– lacked the boundary line of __________________
a. David’s own problem
b. David did not have ___________________________

Lifegroup Discussion Questions

1. What problems can arise from a father often being absent from his family?

2. How can a father, who is often busy at work because he wants to provide well for his family, avoid becoming an absentee father? Can you share some advice and experiences?

3. Modeling is an important boundary line that a father must maintain. If a father realizes that he is lacking in this area, what must he do? If he is totally unrepentant, what should the mother do?

4. “Train up children according to God’s Word,” is the Bible’s instruction to parents. How should a father do this? If a father had not been a good role model and had failed to discipline his children in the past, what should he do now?

Sermon Notes Answers

1. absentee, being present
2. reckless, modeling
3. discipline, disciplining
b. the moral strength

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In this week’s message on the boundaries in marriage, Rev. Jeremiah Cheung starts by redefining important terms that greatly impact the relationships of husbands and wives. He provides a biblical definition of a godly union, then outlines four healthy boundaries that a husband and a wife need to observe for a healthy marriage. See Part 8

Sermon Notes

Today, we will learn about four healthy boundaries in marriage. Before we do so, we need to redefine three important terms because these three are often misinterpreted, especially within the context of marriage, giving rise to a lot of problems.

1. Redefining some terms
a. ___________________
b. ___________________
c. ___________________

2. Four Boundaries for a Healthy Marriage
a. ___________________
b. ___________________
c. ___________________
d. ___________________

Lifegroup Discussion Questions

1. How do the worldly authorities and the spiritual authorities in the Bible differ?

2. What does it truly mean to be a leader?

3. The Bible says: “Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.” Both husband and wife are to learn submission. What is the true meaning of submission?

4. There are 4 boundaries in a healthy marriage, there must be: 1) Self-management, 2) Openness, 3) Mutual Respect, and 4) Response. Which one do you need to learn most? Which one do you feel most deeply about?

Sermon Notes Answers

Answers:
1. a) Authority b) Headship c) Submission
2. a) Self-management b) Openness c) Mutual Respect d) Response

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God values marriage — the union of one man and one woman who are meant to grow in God’s love for one another for the rest of their lives. In this week’s message, Rev. Jeremiah Cheung goes back to the Bible’s definition and design of marriage to explain the boundaries needed for a union that glorifies God. See Part 7

Sermon Notes

1. Redefine Marriage: ________________; _______________; _________________

2. Foundation of Marriage
a. Marriage is itself a ____________
b. Marriage is a union of two _____________ people’s love
• The husband’s obligation: ______________
• The wife’s obligation: ___________________

3. Marriage’s Action – Love’s Action
a. Love is ______
b. Love does not seek to _________
c. Love seeks to ________ and not to _________
d. Love __________
e. Love never ________

Lifegroup Discussion Questions

1. What can you say about the definition of marriage as between “one man, one woman; one husband, one wife; one whole lifetime”? Do you agree with this or not? Why or why not?

2. Marriage is a testimony. What is it a testimony of? How can marriage be a good testimony?

3. The Bible says: The husband must love his wife and the wife must submit to her husband. What problems do you think would occur if we turned it the other way around – the husband submits to the wife and the wife loves her husband?

4. True love is not demonstrated nor felt via words but through action. What are love’s actions? (Love is kind, love does not seek to compete, love seeks to give and not to take, love protects, love never fails). Can you expound on this?

Sermon Notes Answers

Answers:
1. One man, one woman; one husband, one wife; one whole lifetime
2. a) testimony b) imperfect • Love your wife • Submit to the husband
3. a) kind b) complete c) give, take d) protects e) fails

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Seeking a life partner is a crucial matter. The longest chapter in the book of Genesis talks about how Abraham sought a wife for his son, Isaac. Through this passage, Rev. Jeremiah Cheung shares three important principles to guide us in choosing who to marry. See Part 6

Sermon Notes

In Genesis, the Bible begins with a wedding – the wedding of Adam and Eve. In Revelation, the Bible ends with another wedding – the spiritual union of Christ and His Bride, the Church. The first miracle Jesus performed was at a wedding; there, he turned water into wine. God highly values marriage, while Satan attacks marriages most intensely. When a marriage fails, the family fails; when a family fails, God’s church will also fail.

There are 50 chapters in the Book of Genesis and God used the longest chapter, Genesis 24 (with 67 verses) to record one incident – how Abraham sought a wife for his son Isaac. Through this incident, God points out several important principles for us. Through this scripture passage, we see three important boundaries necessary for selecting a life partner:

I. __________ Line – Commit the Matter of Marriage to Prayer
1. ________Prayer
2. _______________Prayer
3. _________Prayer

II. __________ Line – Marry Someone of the Same Faith

III. ___________ Line – Find a Good Partner

Life Group Discussion Questions

1. How many prayers have you offered up for your marriage or the matter of seeking a life partner? Please share your experience.

2. How many prayers have you offered with regards to the matter of your children’s marriage or selecting a life partner?

3. Personally, do you believe that faith is an important boundary in the matter of marriage? Please share your reason/s.

4. Is character a significant requirement for you in seeking a life partner? Why?

5. Which do you think is more important – character or abilities?

Sermon Notes Answers
I) Prayer
1) Abraham’s
2) The Old Servant’s
3) Isaac’s
II) Faith
III) Character

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In our relationships, we need to be ready to forgive just as we need to be forgiven. In this week’s message, Rev. Jeremiah Cheung shows us that true forgiveness is found in the grace we have been shown through Christ. See Part 5

Sermon Notes
When we talk about healthy boundaries and healthy relationships, there are two concepts that we will encounter, which are Freedom and Forgiveness. We spoke about True Freedom last week. Today, we will be talking about True Forgiveness.

In relationships, we need the forgiveness of others because we all inevitably hurt others and have offended other people. Similarly, we also need to forgive others, because we have surely been hurt by others. To have healthy boundaries and relationships, we definitely cannot do without forgiveness. Forgiveness is a very broad topic, and without forgiveness then there can be no true freedom.

Let us look at the true meaning of forgiveness from three angles:
1. ____________ and Forgiveness
2. ___________ and Consequences
3. True and False Forgiveness
a. Forgiveness is not _____________
b. Forgiveness is not _____________
c. Forgiveness is not _____________
d. Forgiveness is not _____________
e. Forgiveness means ________________ for the injury you have done me

Life Group Discussion Questions:

1. Can a person who has been saved by God’s grace not forgive those who have hurt him/her? Why?

2. Punishment and Consequences look very similar on the surface, but how are they different?

3. Can a person live in “The Law of Laws” and “The Law of Grace” at the same time? Why?

4. What is not true forgiveness? What then is true forgiveness? Which aspect do you relate with the most?

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While we are all free to make our own choices, our choices are not free of consequences. In Part 3 of Healthy Boundaries, Healthy Relationships, Rev. Jeremiah Cheung says that God calls us to live in unity and explains that we can achieve it … provided we make the right choices. See Part 4

The Book of Ephesians contains six chapters: The first three chapters discuss doctrine while the latter three chapters focus on the application of the truths. In other words, chapters 1 to 3 talk about what God has done for us, while chapters 4 to 6 discuss what we are to do for God.

In Chapter 4, the first verse contains the word “then” — “As a prisoner of the Lord, then, I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received. Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace.”

The main point of this passage is this: “make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace.” We are to do our best to maintain this unity. Unity is God’s will.

There is a special revelation in the Bible: 1-2-1. The process of one becoming two is called ‘separation’ and then two becoming one is called ‘unity.” How then do we maintain unity? There are two ways people deal with interpersonal relationships: first via blaming and control and second through power and love.

Sermon Notes

1. Blaming and Control vs. __________________

2. Where are the Distinctions?
a. Distinct in __________
b. Distinct in __________
c. Distinct in __________

Discussion Questions

1. There is a special revelation in the Bible: 1-2-1. We call the process of one becoming two ‘separation.” The process of two becoming one, we call `unity’. How can unity be maintained?

2. There are two ways people deal with interpersonal relationships: one is through blaming and control; the second is through power and love. Which of these two were used in your family when you were growing up? In your own family today, which one do you use? Why?

3. There are three areas of distinction between blaming & control and power & love: distinction in power, distinction in motives, and distinction in response. Can you point out how they differ in these aspects?

4. In these three areas of distinction, which area do you find most difficult? What do you need to do to improve in this aspect?

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